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Friday, February 28, 2003






Which Rocky character are you?


Hahahahaha I'm such a hottie nerd!

Today is a glorious day! Beautiful day really. I wish I was outside but no. I'm inside just hanging out. La ti da ti da. I should go outside...ok, I'm going outside!

I'M IN SUCH A GOOD MOOD TODAY, I'M SINGING TO MYSELF!!!

Thursday, February 27, 2003

I'm gonna fly like an eagle to the sea! Fly like an eagle. Let my spirit carry me. Being by the ocean sounds like a grand ol' idea. Warm sun on my back, soft sand between my toes, waves in my ears and an ice-cold bottle of root bear in my hand (Sprecher's only). That would be ffaaaaabulousss. I'm getting all dreamy and lazy just thinking about it. MMMMmmmmmm . . .
I've only seen the ocean once in my whole 18 year existence. I think that's pretty sad. Not only that but the day I saw the ocean, it was all cold and rainy so I didn't even go swimming. Before I'm 20 I want to see the ocean again. This time I'll go swimming regardless of any rain, cold temps, or the like.
************
I don't know why I didn't post this sooner. My Shakespeare prof., Prof Dave, told us this great story last week. A few years ago one of his students was driving through Dell-ville (a town not far from us). He and a friend were going to a party or something and they made a wrong turn. While trying to find their way back the student drove past this house and saw a girl sitting on the front porch. He went around the block and came back to get another look. She was still there just sitting on the porch reading. The student turned to his friend and said, "I'm gonna marry that girl." AND HE DID!! No foolin'! Absolute true story! So girls don't be afraid to sit out on the porch and read. Guys don't be afraid to make wrong turns, or go around the block to get a closer look.

As if this week wasn't hard enough...I mean sure I had a lot of fun on Tuesday, but really that's it. Otherwise, it's been work and stress. This fuckin thing with E is finally over. At least I really hope it is. I think it will be. He prolly hates me now and I don't blame him. Then again, he isn't my favorite person either. So now...what happens? Another one of my exboyfriends might be coming out. Oh great. So now if he does...this will be number 3. And everyone is guessing that this other guy is going to be out soon too. That would make it 4. FOUR!! I'm gonna have to say this doesn't do much for my self esteem.

Pardon me while I go cry.

Wednesday, February 26, 2003

My night with the boiz!
Oh GOD! I had so much FUN!!!! I'm still cheesin' about it!
K and I get to Levi' pad around 7. Derek and a bunch of people I don't know are there. Levi takes us upstairs and who should I see but JAKE!! He's going to the club with us! Oh happiness! So we're all running around having fun, listening to music, reading THE notebook, and getting ready (kinda). Levi takes FOREVER! Oh my god! I never thought a man could take so long just to take a shower and brush his teeth and hair. Wow!
Once everyone is ready to go Levi leads us to Clayton's house. Evidently Clayton was planning a pre and post club party. We got there just as everyone was getting ready to go to the club. Matt is there, and Sean is there and the rest of them I don't know. I don't think I'm going to see them much so I won't give them nick-names yet.
After a little visiting and fooling around Levi, Matt, Derek, Sean, K, Jake, and I are off to the club. It's kind of a long ride from Clayton's house (Clayton had to stay behind to wait for some friends) and with the wrong turn I took it took a little longer. Ooops!
When we get inside they take our IDs and glob some tar on our hands to show we paid.
I am very impressed at this point: black and white checked floor, black lights, laser lights, strobe, great sound system, fog machine, not many people but that changed quickly.
I'm usually hangin' with Levi and K. Sean and Derek join us every now and then. The music is good and the temp is rising. After an hour I'm sweating like a pig! The soda is flat but free (you can't go wrong with free); there's a pool table and some good games going on. I got to dance to Soccer Practice (if you haven't heard of it check it out!).
On the dance floor they have three big wood boxes bolted to the floor. People can get on them and dance (you know the drill). It's to get attention, and it works! Matt took one of the boxes for an hour. He's a good dancer and he's got a lot more confidence then I do. Kudos to Matt! Anyway, Levi and K get up on a box and when they spy me they hall me up there with them. After one song Levi is off to get a drink. K and I stay and keep dancing. After another song these two Mexican guys are by the box trying to get our attention. They want to dance with us. That's fine . . . HOLD IT! It's my obligation to tell you that I am a virgin and have never grinded with a guy. Proceed . . . we get off the box and DUDE it was fun. At the time I was a little creeped out, but once I got into the music and figured out the guy's steps all was well. He was tryin' REAL hard to keep his hands plastered to my ass, but I played it cool and moved his hands up and away from my butt like it was a dance move. After I was able to tear myself away (it wasn't difficult, I just had to come up with a good excuse) I wanted more. So I grinded with Levi. He's so fun to dance with. I would have danced with Sean too, but I didn't want to make him look bad. He is a GREAT dancer! I don't mind admitting that I'm jealous, cause I am.
I HAD SO MUCH FUN! And you know next Tuesday is Mardi Gras!!! I'm getting beads and heading back to Club 5 NEXT WEEK!!!
The night went so well! The only thing that got me was when we got lost. Yes. On our way home I took a wrong turn that set us back AN HOUR!! Can you believe that?! After last night I want one way streets to be illegal!
We made it home alive even though I was so sleepy. I got about 4 hours of sleep, but I'm still functioning, not very well, but I'm functioning.

Who had a lot of fun last night?
K-k-k- Kel had a lot of fun last night.
Is it true?
mmmMMMMM! I did I did I did I d-id!

Wow. So much fun that I can't even type normally. So I'll let Cody put her version up here and then I'll make comments as I see fit.

I LOVE MY BOIZ!!!

...later...
ok where are my peeps to back me up on this? I'm feeling a little lonely.

Tuesday, February 25, 2003

It's just one of those days...you know THOSE days. I just want to do something. I feel the need to be challenged right now and since I'm not...I want to go back to sleep.

I had a lovely walk with C last night. We went out to a state park. Unfortunately, it was dark and cold so we slid around a bit and couldn't see much. But it was still fun. The coolest sound in the world is water running underneath ice. Then we went back to my house. Beppo called and I filled him in a bit on what was going on. He's kinda bothered that he hasn't given us our X-mas presents. I think his are going to be 10x better than what we got him, but oh well.

A friend from Madison, JK called last night at 11:30. I was sleeping, but he's in a play and offered me and C free tickets. Then S called at 2:30am and asked if I wanted to go to a movie. I didn't really talk a lot to either cause I was dead to the world.

Everyone thinks I'm crazy for still talking to E. Latest news...he told my mom I slept with J. That's something I hadn't told her. So yeah, I'm pissed. Understandably too. So it's over. Completely. I just need him to call so I can tell him. Something I hadn't mentioned to anyone, he said before I brought that subject up (asked him why the fuck did he tell my mom that) he was thinking about asking me to marry him. What?! I just broke up with him. Why in the world would I marry him? Especially since I don't plan on getting married for a long time. I think it might be time to tell him to fuck off.

Is it just me or are the Peppers not as super cool as they were. I mean, I think that Californiacation was my favorite Peppers album so far, but I haven' t listened to some of the older ones a lot. And By the Way just isn't that great. I love it, don't get me wrong. But it doesn't seem like real rock. It's just not as...I dunno. It lacks something. Like incubus. They used to be a shit-ton harder. Now they're more Z104 easy rock. Not saying it's bad. I still love them. A lot. But they've changed so much. I love them and have defending them many o' times against people saying they've sold out, but did they? I sure hope not.

Anyway, in case you're wondering about an awesome band that you will never hear of...Metridium. May the fun of you be good.

Ok, enough of this cd. I think I'm gonna listen to Fungus Amongus.

Monday, February 24, 2003

I am so frusterated! I got a "new" computer at work and it sucks! I can't do anything!! I can't even find Microsoft Word! Honestly this sucks. I traded a slow computer which had super programs and such for a fast computer on which I can't do anything. Including find my fuckin files! So now I sit here with non of my stuff, no word, not even a fuckin cd to listening to and no one can help me cause they're all busy. Damn them. And damn this machine!

wow, I completely forgot about that. Hmmm. I don't know what to say...

Saturday, February 22, 2003

Kelly: woot! Kelly and Levi here to rock your world! .. ummmm
Levi: We're here to blow your minds... as well as other things =o )
K: Speak for yourself
L: Well... your blowing me... so HA!
K: "You're" and not really...I believe that is the crazy next door neighbor guy
L: http://www.nobodyhere.com/justme/nose.php3 Isn;t this cool?
K: Sure.........I'm full
L: Full of what?
K: Wendy's and Mambas
L: Cool
K: yeah...but I'm tooo fulll....hahahahaha I can't type...tyhepe

L: TYHEPE??? Sounds like an STD my sister has.. Yer a silly Fruit Fly, You Silly Fruit Fly
K: silly.....*snores*
L: SPATULA WIGWAM BEIGE RONKOKOMO
K: Thats profound...wow
L: Kelly is High... She'll Deny it.. but she is SOOO HIGH
K: nope. I'm not high. I'm hi
L: You're more baked than a burned cake
K: ruined a perfectly good cake to prove your point and I';; *snore*
L: Ever hear of the hindlick maneuver? It's where you spread apart a suculent set of buns and lick them
K: So what do you think of Uranus as a whole?
L WHOLEY MONTHER OF GOD! THATS A BIG FUCKIN HOLE.. ... TARAH!!! CLOSE YOUR LEGS! YOUR SUCKING IN CHICAGO!
K: I was outted tonight. I was told that I'm a closet girly-girl.
L: See... Kelly Ann Is a girly Girl... She always has been. See... She was a girly girl cuz She tried too hard. She was always trying to be a butch bitch lezbo type and it didn't work for her cuz she likes flowers, kittens, pink, and Platform Shoes... oh... and Boiz... I use boiz with an I cuz they all turn out gay cuz her girly-girl-ness rubs off on them.
K: no...no. *snore*
L: She's STILL in denial She obsesses with her girly-girl-ness so much that she can;t come to terms easily.. Lets SUPPORT her like an over the shoulder boulder holder in her time of need!
K: no. I am so far from trying to be a lezbo... it's not funny. Well, not that I'm trying not to be. It's just that I'm not. So there....
L: Kelly... U want some more Apple Juice?
K: hehehehe You're Funny.. It burns
K: I have alot of change.. Ok.. We're logging off now... Bye


Friday, February 21, 2003

I haven't cried since I saw Star Trek. Now that I've started...I just can't stop. That's not a good thing when you're sitting at work. So many things...now what? I just kinda feel abandoned even tho that is not the case. So many people seem to be leaving or have already left. It just sucks.

Last night E stopped by my house to drop off my writing portfolio. He's going away. Probably forever. We didn't talk a whole lot. He mainly said, stay the way you are...you're so close to perfect and you keep striving...I'll send ya a postcard. I cried before he got there. Teared up a bit during and just cried afterwards. I called up Beppo and, oh I love that boy, he let me talk. I'm so lucky to have such great friends. Man oh man. I swear, I'll stop crying soon. I promise. Or not. It's kinda hard knowing that I won't be able to see him again. With almost every other ex, I figured I'd at least run into them. And I have. But I might never see him again.

Just so you know. I'm not crying for him. I'm crying for me. I'm selfish like that.

Ok, I quit

Thursday, February 20, 2003

I was sincere. ;) We're all pulchrae feminae (beautiful women)

Oh I know. But it sounds so much more humble and shy if you say "ahhh, shucks. You don't mean that?" all the time knowing that, damn someone thinks I'm beautiful.

And you could take it two ways. One: you're a beautiful person. Two: you look damn good. (I'd rather be a beautiful person myself). And even if they don't really think that you're beautiful, they think enough of your feelings to say so anyway. Now, whether they care about your feelings because they are a sincere person or if they simply want to get into your pants is another thing entirely.

But I'll trust Kasey to not want to get into my pants.

She's right you know. We are!

beautiful girls

Wednesday, February 19, 2003

So it was a great night of hanging out with fun people.

And I'm single again. hmmmm

And Kasey...I'm not in Latin...what in the world does that mean?

pulchrae puellae

Tuesday, February 18, 2003

SuperDude, my way cool and musical friend from up north may be coming to see me! I just think this is fantastic. I've only hung out with the guy four times. Well, some of those times were kinda long. But I still think it's awesome that he'll give up his day off to drive all the way down here and spend money on a hotel room...just to see me. And C of course. Man, I am going to marry him someday. I wonder if he knows. And my former best friend (remember JA?) is going to come with him! So I get to see them both. It'll be great!

The only problem with them is that they might be coming down a weekend that we might have been able to go up. Cause we still need to see Beppo. We kinda ditched out on him this last weekend cause of issues we had and so I think he's feeling a little angry about that. I don't know for sure, but I would be. In fact, I have been. But if I'm finally getting someone to visit me down here...I can't give that up. I love my boys! All of them. And it's just too bad they can't play nice together.

In other news...C and I are undertaking a huge task which we just might be able to fulfill. It will be a hard and dangerous mission, but someone has to do it. Details tomorrow.

Monday, February 17, 2003

Said about me:

"Don't you think she's a little homely? She has nice legs and ass tho." - E's dad after meeting him for the first time.
"Have you ever thought about being a model?" - Sauk County Police officer in a restaurant after he had been drinking a bit.
"Oh you're just so cute!" - Random guys at Kitchen random nights.
"AHHHHHH!" - My dad...being my dad.
"How do you wake up looking just like you did when you went to sleep?" - A "beautiful person" in high school after riding a bus for 15 hours.
"See ya later hot and sexy!" - A six year old little boy saying good bye after not speaking to me before because I had clothes on.

Sunday, February 16, 2003

Do the happy dance.
I don't want to do that happy dance
Do that happy dance!
*dances unenthuastically
Sing the song.
I don't want to.
Sing the SONG!
Doin the happy dance...doin the happy dance...doin the happy dance.
Feel better?
Yeah...

Friday, February 14, 2003

Things are fucked.

Wednesday, February 12, 2003

oh god. just when I thought things were going to get easier...

E and I are fighting. Issues about Valentine's Day and I guess trust. My own sister helped him to think there was something going on. That's not right. So now who shows up? jonk. Wanting to go out sometime. I wasn't made for this kinda of drama.

Tuesday, February 11, 2003

So . . . Be my Valentine? teeheehee
Valentine's Day is so controversial. I love it! I've spend every year sense 7th grade bouncing between the Anti-V's and the LoVers. It's fun either way. The Anti-V's, we'd watch anti-love movies, talk, and get fat together. The loVers and I would watch lovey-dovey flicks, and/or do something special for/with each other.
Never had a boyfriend on Valentine's Day. I don't think it's a terrible big deal. It sure saves on regret and B.H.S. (Broken Heart Syndrome).
Call me selfish, but I'd like to be the center of someone's attention for once. I'm bored with living the single life on Valentine's Day . . . and any other day for that matter. I suppose it's a little late for that now, but a girl can dream can't she?
Oh if you only knew!

Monday, February 10, 2003

I'm growing up. Every now and then people need an outlet. Somewhere to go and just have something for them. For the last couple of months, this was it for me. I stopped writing in my journal and instead changed this from what it was supposed to be to my own life on screen. But I don't know if I need it any longer. More and more often I find myself staring at a blank screen with a blinking cursor waiting to be move and filled with words. More and more the words are meaning less. I can't force myself to tell everything and it's gotten harder to do. What if someone I know finds this? What if I want someone I know to find this?

And in some ways I do want that. There are a couple of people I wish I could say "Read this! It will tell you a lot of things that I don't say! Understand me!" I might still. But that wouldn't be fair to Cody. There are some very private things both of us has shared in here. Stuff that no one else may know. I know I have. So what to do?

I might be totally wrong and still come in here to write. But honestly, how many people are actually reading this? And how many actually want to know how my day went?

So maybe it's time to shut up.

Friday, February 07, 2003



I, as a clerihew,
Tend to be merry; too
Merry, it might, perhaps, by some, be claimed;
But I'm sure that these people are wrong, and need to be grievously maimed.
What Poetry Form Are You?

What a day. This sucks. My supervisor is quitting. She's so much fun I'm going to miss her a shit-ton and still can't believe that I won't get to hang out with her anymore. I'm so very sad I can't even go into it. My poor boss is going to be all alone. The supervisor is like his sidekick. They're always together. I know why I made those cd's now. The beginning and the end...sad sad sad.

So last night was decent. I cleaned my room up some more. C came over. We watched South Park and Shanghi Noon. Cute and clever. Owen Wilson is just neato.

Ok, I'm not really in a talking or typing mood today so...latas

Thursday, February 06, 2003

Good afternoon my adoring fans! And, yes, it IS a good afternoon. I'm having a grand ol' day and I can't figure out why. Well, it could be that my Calc. exam has been moved from tomorrow to next Tuesday, but I'm not sure ; )
Is there anyone out there that knows how difficult and unfulfilling it is to shoot a game of pool without the 8-ball? Dude, it SUCKS! Our game room has been missing the 8-ball for nearly a week. Who ever stole it had better give it back!

Good morning...no fuck that. Actually, I don't know if it's a good morning or not. I was fine until I got to work and saw a bunch of stuff piled on my chair for me to do. Not fun. Then I got my good tasty coffee and am going to eat a bagel. Is caffine an appetite supressor? Cause I'm not really that hungry and all I've had is three cups of coffee. SluRP!

Hmmm, I went shopping. Fun fun fun. I got 1, 2, 3, 4 new shirts! And Hugo Boss for men which I fully plan on wearing. It's not that manly of a scent on me. Just nice and vanilla-y, cedar-y and spicy. So I don't smell like a man.

My office smells like food. There is coffee that smells like frosting, my Boss that smells all food like and then a banana bread candle. So yum!

Wednesday, February 05, 2003

So I get to leave early, I get to leave early! Nah nah nah nah boo boo. At 3. And it is 2. 2:16. So soon! Oh shit, I need to finish this ad! Latas

SNOT RAG!
So anyway . . . Did the sky look all pink and stuff to anyone else this morning? Boy was is pink in my town! Pink like a rubber ball. Pink like florescent Pepto Bismal. Pink like Aerosmith.
Enough pink! I like green best. Green like grass. Green like Green Eggs and Ham. Green like Fried Green Tomatoes. Yeah that green.
About this whole snow hiding the ice thing. It's a dirty trick and I want it to stop! Snow should be safe. I look at the side walk and I want to be able to think that if there's an inch or more of snow on the sidewalk I will be able to walk on it without fear of falling. Obviously I can't do that anymore. I think I really messed up my shoulder and forearm this time tho. I slipped on the ice Monday morning (Monday Monday dada-da-dada), and rather than falling I tried to catch myself. Oh did that smart in a painfully unsmart way! My shoulder got inflamed and I can't lift my arm past my shoulders without a ton load of pain. It's no fun. And best of all it's my right arm, so now my left has to do most of the work. Lemme tell ya, he ain't happy about that.

Tuesday, February 04, 2003

Wow...I no feel good. Tired as all hell. I was in bed and ready to sleep at 11 or so...but then Erick called. And we talked until 1. Or I should say he talked. Cause at the end there...I was falling asleep. As best as I could tho cause he was making me laugh. Silly E.

I went over to my sister's last night. We watched the Banger Sisters and ate food. That's right, food.

Now I'm tired. And I'd rather sleep than sit here and complain about it, but I'm at work...dur I'm babbling.

Manohman, I should have said I was snowbound. Sorry, can't come in. Maybe tomorrow. Doubt it. I'm a good person...and I need all my days off that I have. Cause I want to take Valentine's Day off so I can go to the club the night before. Then sleep in, hang out with E a bit and then go to town C. Horray! I don't know if things would ever go to plan like that.

Beppo called me last night. OH. Same person. Whatever, I don't care. Beppo called. We talked a bit. He's still not happy, but he can't really do anything about it cause he can't afford to move away. If I was unhappy as he says he is tho, I would take off anyway. Say fuck it, I'm moving to the south. Somewhere warmer than this stupid Wisconsin stuff.

Ok, I just called S and she said that the club plan was to go on the 12. I was planning on the 13. So what to do now? Hmmm. This is why I don't plan. I'd rather make it up as I go than be expecting something and get something totally different.

Monday, February 03, 2003

I want to sing. I want to sing and make everyone out there that's reading this hear it: all the glass shattering and the dogs howling . . . yeah . . . that's the stuff . . . hostess!
So about this whole . . . thing. Does anyone get it? I mean that guy . . . he's saying all this stuff and sure it makes some sense, but the dude doesn't seem to know English. No speaka de ingleesh, you know what I mean?
NO YOU DON'T! I made it all up.
BLAH-HALB
OH! Class time! Be back in a jiffy peanut butter kinda of fast way.

Farther along the earth's orbital bath - BATH? I guess I CAN be dyslexic even when I'm typing.
Today is the day I begin to speak my own language. Some words people will know or might know later on if they sit down and think about it real hard. Other words or the reason regular words are used in the fashion that they are will remain unknown until I feel like taddling on myself. Taddling on myself? That sounds all dirty and wrong in a wirty and drong sort of way. BLECH!
Today is also the day I force myself to work out after my classes. I haven't been to the gym in over 5 months. I feel bad about it but before there was nothing I could do. It was either work, school, or friends and I hardly had time for me. Poor me. I'm sorry me. But all that will change. Today! Riiiiiiight-MEOW!
Well now right meow . . . I have to finish writing . . . OK I'm done.

I'm such a cheesy dork sometimes. From 10:30 on Saturday night until last night (Sunday) at 11:13, I was with E. I had so much fun! We watched Moulin Rouge (well, I did, he fell asleep). Took a nap from 3:30 in the morning until 5 in the morning or something.

I have Kenny Chesney in my head. People say they wouldn't change a thing...even if they could...Oh but I would How pretty.

So D and her little baby boy came over yesterday too. I cooked us all breakfast and then later lunch. It was a pretty good time. I kicked D's ass! She kept wanting to wrestle...so anytime she was brave enough to try and take me on without E's help, I whooped up on her...but if her and E worked together...they really suck cause I almost got hurt a couple of times.

D really tries to get everything she can get outta me. Like I already got her a $30 gift card to Maurices. Then I offered to take her out to dinner if she wasn't doing anything on her birthday. She said maybe. Then said no, but I could take her out tonight if I wanted. I didn't. So then she said I could get her a 56 oz bottle of Malibu instead. What? I just offered to take her out so she wouldn't be alone on her birthday. Not buy her a $20+ bottle of booze on top of already spending $30 on her. It's pretty typical of her tho. I took her out shopping instead of going to her baby shower and bought her $40+ of stuff for the kid. Then later she kept trying to get me to buy more stuff. I know this doesn't seem like a ton of money, but just to keep on doing that...It's not right. I help her out all the time. I used to give her gas money and still take her all around town. I would buy her and her kid food so he didn't starve (not that it's a bad thing).

I'm just having issues about being taken advantage of and I'm going to try to not let it happen anymore.

But I feel really guilty if I even think I might have taken advantage of a friend. I know I prolly have, but there is also an acceptable give and take. Like C and I will get chinese and sometimes I pay and sometimes she pays. I don't know who has paid more and it doesn't matter. Things like her being the perma-driver to town C now tho...I feel a little guilty of that. Even tho she said she likes driving and I pay for half the gas. I still feel bad cause I'm not ... pulling my fair share? I dunno.

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