Tuesday, June 24, 2003
I feel like I don't think I should be. I just don't care right now. I've been so insanely emotional the last week that I just can't handle it anymore. I go from soaring highs to the bottom of an endless depression. In twenty minutes! Besides tearing up a bit this morning when talking to my sister, I haven't really been able to feel a whole lot.
And it bothers me. But not really because I'd don't feel any emotion.
But what can I do? There is no fuckin way I'm getting meds for depression. I'd like to see a therapist just for kicks for a while, but that's expensive stuff right there.
I think it's just people. There are so many fake people out there. They seem like friends and they seem like they care, but they just aren't there for you when you need them.
And then the last couple of days I've been thinking about how people just walk in and out of your life. There are so many people I'm not ready to let go of. It really gets me down when I think I'll prolly never see 'this' person again or 'this' one. I love meeting new people, they have different experiences to share and new ideas to ponder. I can think of a lot of people I've met once and never saw again. Even people from a couple of summers ago! But then I feel bad when I can't remember someone from a week earlier. Which has happened.
On the plus side, my mom found $35 of mine behind my dresser at their house.
And it bothers me. But not really because I'd don't feel any emotion.
But what can I do? There is no fuckin way I'm getting meds for depression. I'd like to see a therapist just for kicks for a while, but that's expensive stuff right there.
I think it's just people. There are so many fake people out there. They seem like friends and they seem like they care, but they just aren't there for you when you need them.
And then the last couple of days I've been thinking about how people just walk in and out of your life. There are so many people I'm not ready to let go of. It really gets me down when I think I'll prolly never see 'this' person again or 'this' one. I love meeting new people, they have different experiences to share and new ideas to ponder. I can think of a lot of people I've met once and never saw again. Even people from a couple of summers ago! But then I feel bad when I can't remember someone from a week earlier. Which has happened.
On the plus side, my mom found $35 of mine behind my dresser at their house.
